Dance With Me

Friends from the Bay Area stayed at our house over the weekend. They were competing in the same-sex dance competition in Sacramento, a series of dance events that will culminate with their competing in the Gay Games in Cologne, Germany, the end of July. The Games are built upon the principles of participation, inclusion and personal best™, for more than 25 years. We went to the ballroom Sunday to cheer them on. Literally. "Go #148!" It was a noisy, joyous gathering with sparkly, skin-baring costumes, black dance pants, coordinating outfits, high heels, flat dance shoes, chiffony scarves, ruffles, ties. There were three categories, A, B and C. Our friends were graded in the C group and by winning that round, were chosen to advance to the B group. This meant dancing four different dances in the C group and then, after a brief break, four more dances with the B group, ending with the Quick Step. But they had achieved their goal of moving into the B group before the Games.

There were more women than men couples. One of the male couples had danced on "So You Think You Can Dance" where one of the judges said he'd like to see them both dance with a girl, adding, "You never know, you might enjoy that, too." In an interview, they explained it's not about girls and boys but about leading and following. We can all do that, right?

There's that quote about Ginger Rogers being a better dancer because she did everything Fred Astaire did but backwards and in heels. But hopefully we are reaching a point where it doesn't matter which partner leads or who dances with who. What I saw Sunday was a whole lot of people having a wonderful time together.

When John & I lived in Suriname, we took Mambo lessons from a teacher who spoke Dutch. We were the oldest couple in the group, and I remember how easy it was to master the basic steps, and then how difficult each new variation became. It was difficult to just sink into the music and move without counting out the steps in my head. When I was able to get through a dance with a minimum of missteps, I remember feeling the flow of joy as we all moved to the beat of the music. It felt freeing and equalizing. Dancing is joy.